From shivers to shrieks: Spooky stories for Halloween

A lot of people enjoy being scared. I'm not sure why that is, but the plethora of scary movies, scary books, scary television shows — and scary vampires and zombies everywhere — confirm that to be true.

Even my grandsons like to be scared. Sort of.

Bubby and Mac like sort of scary stuff that sort of scares them a little. Especially sort of scary Halloween stuff. And sort of scary Halloween books, in particular. In fact, when I visited my grandsons in July, we went to the library one day and Bubby made a B line for the Halloween picture books. In July!

(Of course, his mom contributed to the early enjoyment of all things spooky. Megan loves Halloween picture books, too, and checked out a huge stack of sort-of-spine-tingling tales for her and the boys to enjoy. In July.)

The joy my grandboys — and their mother, my daughter — get out of Halloween books is part of the reason I was delighted to receive (free for review) several Halloween books from Candlewick Press. I'll be packing a few of them — the sort of scary ones, at least scary for wee ones — in my Grandma Bag to share with Bubby and Mac when I visit next week.

Another reason I was delighted to get the spooky stories? So I could share them with you here today.

(Don't be afraid... they're mostly just sort of scary. I promise.)

Vampire Baby by Kelly Bennett, illustrated by Paul Meisel ($15.99, Ages 4-7) Mac is going to love, love, love this one, as he's been experiencing a few bites from one of his fellow toddlers at his babysitter's. I'm thrilled there's a trailer for it, so you can get a real taste (har, har) for this treat.

Ghost in the House by Ammi-Joan Paquette, illustrated by Adam Record ($15.99, ages 3-7 years) A rhythmic tale where the spooky stuff grows in number with each turn of the page.
From Candlewick: When a little ghost goes slip-sliding down the hallway, he suddenly hears... a groan! Turns out it’s only a friendly mummy, who shuffles along with the ghost, until they encounter... a monster! As the cautious explorers continue, they find a surprise at every turn — and add another adorably ghoulish friend to the count. But you’ll never guess who is the scariest creature in the house!

Filbert, the Good Little Fiend by Hiawyn Oram, illustrated by Jimmy Liao ($15.99, ages 3-7) I love this book so, because Filbert makes me think of Bubby and the angel character makes me think of Mac. I have a feeling they will agree (or fight over who's who; we'll see).
From Candlewick: Daddy and Mommy Fiend want their little Filbert to be gruesome and ghastly, but he won’t trample or terrify, roar or holler. He’d much rather help an old lady with her bags or go bird-watching. What are they to do with him? When Filbert starts school, he quickly learns that good behavior isn’t tolerated in class, and he is banished outside until he can act like a proper little fiend. Suddenly a little angel appears, flying fast and furious until... bump! Could this naughty Angel-School dropout be just the friend Filbert needs? Could they find a way together to make everyone accept them as they are?

The Music of Zombies by Vivian French, illustrated by Ross Collins ($15.99, ages 8-12) See? I told you: Zombies are everywhere. But this book seems like a must-have for preteens who enjoy sort of scary tales. I envision the entire series (this is the fifth Tale from the Five Kingdoms) being a great gift for the holidays.
From Candlewick: Prince Albion expects a unique occasion when he starts planning Cockenzie Rood Day to celebrate his kingdom—and himself. What he doesn’t expect is boppings on the head and kidnapping, all because a zombie wants to play his fiddle in the talent contest. With a misbehaving path, a romantic bat, and a greedy butler to set them on their way, Gracie Gillypot and Prince Marcus are off on their fifth adventure. It’s up to a Trueheart, a resourceful prince, and Gubble the troll to stop the zombie before he does some giant damage to the Five Kingdoms.

Feral Nights by Cynthia Leitich Smith ($17.99, ages 14 years and up) This is one I plan to read in the nights leading up to Halloween. The back-cover quote from The Horn Book calling it "A hearty meal for the thinking vampire reader" has me intrigued... and ready to be sort of scared.
From Candlewick: When sexy, free-spirited werecat Yoshi tracks his sister, Ruby, to Austin, he discovers that she is not only MIA, but also the key suspect in a murder investigation. Meanwhile, Werepossum Clyde and human Aimee have set out to do a little detective work of their own, sworn to avenge the brutal killing of werearmadillo pal Travis. When all three seekers are snared in an underground kidnapping ring, they end up on a remote island inhabited by an unusual (even by shifter standards) species and its cult of worshippers. Their hosts harbor a grim secret: staging high-profile safaris for wealthy patrons with evil pedigrees, which means that at least one newcomer to the island is about to be hunted. As both wereprey and werepredator fight to stay alive, it’s up to mild-mannered Clyde — a perennial sidekick — to summon the hero within. Can he surprise even himself?

Find out more about these books and others at Candlewick.com.

Best wishes for a splendidly spooky weekend!

Disclosure: The books above were sent to me free for review. Opinions and anecdotes are my own.

Today's question:

What is the last scary — or sort of scary — book you read?

Wherein Grandma rethinks the family bed

Our kids climb into bed with Jim and me each morning. Their sole goal? To get us to rise and shine, get up and give them breakfast.

Now, that may seem strange considering our three daughters are adults and don't live in our house. But it's not our human kids I'm talking about, it's our cat kids.

Early each morning, Abby and Isabel hop onto the foot of the bed and meow their way all the way up to our heads, demanding we notice them, love them, and, most importantly, get out of the freakin' bed and feed them. Abby in particular is the alarm kitty. If I ignore her pleas, she heads on over to my iPhone cord on the night stand and starts chewing on it, for she knows darn well that will have me up and at her in a split second.

Yesterday morning when "the girls" got into bed with us, I mentioned to Jim how crazy it would be if we let our dogs into the bed with us, too. Mickey and Lyla have their own bedroom, though, with a baby gate put up each night so they can't get out — which means they can't climb into our bed in the morning, like the cats do.

"Just think if they did," I said to Jim. "We'd have all our kids in bed with us."

Which led me to immediately mention that our real kids — our human kids, our daughters — never climbed into bed with us in the mornings. Never.

Why is that? I wondered out loud. It's not like the girls weren't allowed in our bedroom, weren't welcome to join us if they felt the need.

I remember one night in particular when Andrea definitely felt the need. It was during the summer between her fifth- and sixth-grade years at school, a scary transitional time that caused her to have nightmares. After several failed attempts to calm her fears in her own bed one night, she took me up on the offer to sleep in a makeshift bed on the floor beside ours.

That didn't work. Andie still couldn't sleep, still was afraid.

So I told her we'd turn on the television in our bedroom to the Cartoon Network — at a very low volume — to take her mind off scary things.

Regardless of volume level, though, the George of the Jungle Marathon running on the network that night was the stuff of nightmares, at least for Jim and me. ♪George, George, George of the Jungle, watch out for that tree!♪ kept us awake — and unhappy — for hours.

After a several episodes, we'd had enough. Andie apparently had, too, for she didn't balk too much when I led her back to her own bed. Where she did finally fall asleep.

Jim and I, though, couldn't fall asleep for we couldn't get ♪George, George, George of the Jungle♪ out of our heads, out of our dreams.

Never again, we told ourselves... and our girls. To this day, mentions of George of the Jungle elicit groans and grins from Jim, Andrea and myself as we recall the nightmarish marathon.

Back in those childrearing years, I was thankful the girls rarely asked to sleep in our bed and that they never woke us in the mornings by crawling under the covers with us. But now it saddens me.

It saddens me because as a grandma, I realize what Jim and I missed. The mornings when I'm visiting my grandsons and they crawl into bed with me — which is every morning when I'm at their house... and usually before the sun even considers creeping up over the horizon — are some of the sweetest moments shared with my beloved boys.

Which is one of the more important things Jim and I failed to learn when our girls were little.

There's no going back, though, no way to remedy that error we made with our children. But we can, as grandparents, make the most of the moments when our grandchildren crawl into bed with us.

I will do exactly that with open arms next week, when I'll be sleeping one room away from Bubby and Mac.

Next week I'll have four mornings to relish the slow creaking open of Gramma's bedroom door as the boys together peek in at me, then the pitter-patter of little feet scampering over to my bed while I pretend I'm asleep. Then I'll lift the covers, make room for Bubby on one side, Mac on the other. We'll snuggle for just a bit, and once they've done all the snuggling their wiggly little boy bodies can handle, we'll discuss our dreams from the night, recite our plans for the day.

I didn't get it with my girls, but I now realize with my boys that such times truly are the best part of waking up when there are children in the house.

As a parent, the family bed was never my thing, for I didn't want to be continually awakened by little kids.

As a grandparent, I can't imagine any better wake-up call.

Today's question:

Did your kids climb into bed with you in the mornings? Do your grandkids?

Helping boys cope plus GRAND Social No. 70

I have three daughters. Lifting them up and doing all I could to help them cope with getting through girlhood on their way to womanhood was always top of mind for me as a mother. For decades, it seemed the concerns of girls and the issues they face were top of mind not just for myself and other mothers of girls but for society as a whole.

In the meantime, boys and their equally scary and scarring issues fell through the cracks. I never really considered the depth of despair mothers of boys might be going through while we mothers of girls had research and support of all sorts to help us muddle our way through raising our daughters.

Now that I have grandsons, though, I do consider the plight of boys. Fortunately society as a whole seems to be considering such things a bit more of late, too.

I recently learned of a new book that, though I've not yet read it, seems to me like one everyone — parents and grandparents of boys and girls — should look into. I've added it to my must-read list after seeing the trailer last week. I was so alarmed by the stats on boys that I felt compelled to share the trailer with you.

Take a look:

(Masterminds & Wingmen on Vimeo.)

This isn't a sponsored post nor is it a review of Masterminds & Wingmen. I simply think we all should find out more about how to lift up our sons and grandsons and help them cope in their journey from boyhood to manhood. This book might shed light on how to do that. If you know of other resources that could further make a difference for boys, feel free to share in the comments. And if you read Masterminds & Wingmen, I'd love to know what you think.

I'd also love to see you participate in GRAND Social No. 70 — by either sharing a link, reading the links of those who share or both. Let's dive in!

How it works:

• All grandparent bloggers are invited to add a link. You don't have to blog specifically about grandparenting, just be a grandparent who blogs.

• To link up a post, copy the direct URL to the specific post — new or old — that you want to share, not the link to your blog's home page. Then click the blue button marked with "Add your link" below and follow the directions.

• You can add up to three posts, but no duplicates, contests, giveaways, or Etsy sites, please.

• Adding a mention such as This post linked to the GRAND Social to your linked posts is appreciated. Or, you can post the GRAND Social button anywhere on your page using the following code:

<a href="/" rel="nofollow" target="_blank"><img src="http://grandmasbriefs.squarespace.com/storage/GRANDsocialbutton.jpg " alt="Grandma’sBriefs.com" width="125" height="125" /></a>

• The GRAND Social linky is open for new posts through Wednesday evening, so please come back to see those added after your first visit.


• If you're not a blogger, you have the pleasure of being a reader. Bloggers who link up would be honored to have one and all — other bloggers as well as readers — visit, read and, if so moved, comment, even if just a "Hey, stopping by from the GRAND Social."

• For another grandparent linky, visit Connie's Grandparent's Say It Saturday Link Party each Saturday.

New mom possessiveness: Seeking help from the grandmahood

I recently received an email from a pregnant mother who will soon have her first child. As the baby's birth nears, the new mom wrote, she's having difficulty coming to terms with the intense, scary and perfectly normal feelings of possessiveness over her baby — especially in relation to the soon-to-be-born child's grandmothers.

"Can you help?" she asked me.

Seems my post titled Grandma's No. 1 came up when this new mother Googled search queries such as "grandma obsessed with my baby." Admittedly, I just may sound a tad obsessed in that post, but I wrote those words from the heart and believe it's the truth on how many a grandma feels about her grandchildren. We are obsessed.

Which is exactly what concerns this new mother. It's why she asked if I could help her understand us crazy-in-love grandmas — an understanding that may help if her baby's grandmas turn out like the rest of us.

Before I respond to her, though, I'm seeking input from you, the Grandma's Briefs "grandmahood." Together we may properly shed light on why grandmothers feel the way we do. My hope is that as a whole, we can offer some guidance regarding what she calls the "stickiness in my heart" and her overwhelming feelings of possessiveness for her newborn when it comes to the "pretty reasonable" grandmothers in her life, who admittedly "haven't pulled any super crazy overbearing grandparent moves." 

First, of course, I must share with you the new mom's concerns about grandmothers in general and my Grandma's No. 1 post in particular. So here is the bulk of her letter to me:

There was a specific part in your post that bothered me. You said, "The thing is, when it comes to grandkids — and any grandma knows this, so I'm pretty much talking to the non-grandmas here — it's such a fresh, new, overwhelming love that it's hard to not gush and glow over it. New mothers feel the very same world-shaking love for their newborn, for their little ones as they grow..."

I have to very much disagree that grandmothers feel the SAME love for a newborn as their mothers do. Strong and also world-shaking, yes — but not the same. And even the way you worded this — that in fact mothers share the same love as grandmothers, instead of the other way around, also rubbed me the wrong way.

I also truly don't understand this section: "Much to their delight, they're getting a second opportunity to relish the fully-enveloping motherly love for a child. And relish it we do. Just like we did when our first child was born. And the second. And the third. And more."

I see what you're saying here, but this is NOT your child — so it is not the same love, and it may feel fully enveloping but it should still not compete with the mother's own love.

I'm sorry if I sound confrontational. That isn't my intention. I hope you'll forgive my very strong new mama feelings.

So please, please tell me: Do grandparents actually think that their love for the grandkids is the same as the parents' love?

I genuinely do not understand the grandparent obsession, to the point that it seems unhealthy to me. And I know all the boundary-less women my mom and MIL know that have grandkids are not helping them to be sane about my baby. I and am of course on the other side of life right now and just really struggling to relate to their feelings. I want to respect them, but also set reasonable boundaries.

Any tips on how to handle these feelings without hurting the grandparents' feelings or causing strife? Is this just something that needs to change in my heart?

Thanks for listening.

I want to tell this new mother that yes, we grandmothers do feel an all-consuming love for our grandchildren that is just like that of a mother, at least in terms of the degree of consumption.

I want to tell her that reasonable, well-intentioned grandmothers certainly don't want to possess or parent our grandchildren, that we delight in seeing our children parent our grandchildren, sometimes with such delight we fear our hearts will burst with pride.

And I want to tell her the importance of remembering that at least one of the grandmothers she worries about once held her in their arms, that they loved, adored, cuddled and worried about her in exactly the same way she is and will with her baby. That that grandmother fully understands and could shed light on the situation better than any stranger could. So talk to her about boundaries, expectations, her love and respect for the grandmothers in relation to what works for her as a new mother.

Mostly, I just want to tell her to not fret about competition or who loves the baby more, to accept that her role as the one and only mother of that child is a given — and that rational, loving grandmothers will give her the space to be that, do that, own that.

That's what I want to tell that new mother. But I want to know what you — the grandmothers and others who may see yourself in my words or hers — would tell this heart-heavy mother who wants to do and be and feel what's right for her baby, for the grandmothers and for herself.

So please share your thoughts. Ultimately, perhaps the best thing for me to do is direct the new mom to this post and your comments, so she'll glean guidance from the grandmahood collective, not just from me. I thank you. I venture to say she will, too.

Today's question:

What would you say to the new mother regarding the "stickiness" in her heart?

Kids, cars and heatstroke prevention

My grandsons live in the desert. Deserts being what they are, it's hot there. So hot, in fact, Bubby and Mac — and everyone else in their area — are often warned during the summer to stay indoors because venturing outside can be downright dangerous to their health. Fatal even.

So the boys stay and play in the house on such days. Except when attending swimming lessons or play dates at the local water park, which make the temps semi bearable. Staying in the water was pretty much the only way I, a mountain dweller, survived outdoor fun when visiting my grandsons a few weeks ago.

 

Because of how horrendously hot it is in the desert, I've been concerned since Bubby's birth more than five years ago about the possibility one of my sweet grandsons might suffer heatstroke by being in a hot vehicle too long. I have no doubt those who care for Bubby and Mac, especially my daughter and son-in-law, are incredible, loving, conscientious people who would never, ever intentionally leave one of the boys in the car, let alone long enough to suffer any ill effects.

I know that with all my heart.

Yet, it's still a possibility because such things happen — unfortunately and so very unintentionally — all the time.

Yesterday was National Heatstroke Prevention Day, which focuses on preventing children dying in hot vehicles. The National Highway Traffic Safety Administration and Safe Kids Worldwide joined together to raise awareness about the issue, which has taken the lives of more than 24 kids in the United States so far just this year.

I'm a day late in sharing this information with you, at least in terms of coinciding with the national campaign, but it's never too late to be more aware of the issue. So, though it's hard on the heart to see and hear, please watch and consider the following video. Then do share it with those who care for your beloved little ones. Because heatstroke deaths in children don't happen just in the desert, and they certainly don't happen just to the children of "bad" parents.

Today's question:

What is the highest temps have gotten at your place so far this summer?

Picture this: A little perspective

Last Thursday morning as I did my best to keep my wits about me while preparing to leave for BlogHer '13, I received a last-minute text message from Megan. It was the following photo of Mac — a reminder to breathe and not take stressful conference-attending matters too seriously.

It worked. Seriously, how could it not?

Today's question:

What child most recently made you smile... and how?

Picture this: It takes two

Two kids. Two parents. Two times the fun getting ready to go.

Slice of family life — July 14, 2013

Today's question:

When it comes to getting the family out the door (now or in the past), were/are you typically the one running behind or the one keeping everyone else on time?