10 ways to support school-bound grandchildren

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Kids of all ages will soon head back to school — if they haven't already. Though Mom and Dad play the starring role in supporting their children's educational efforts, grandparents have plenty of opportunities to make their mark, too.

Here are a few suggestions for supporting school-bound grandchildren in ways that will garner an A+ not only from the kids, but from their parents and teachers, too.

back to school ideas for grandparents

1. Send a care package to be opened the night before school starts. Consider adding new cozy jammies to help ease pre-first-day jitters (or to cuddle in after a rough first day), new pencils emblazoned with favorite characters, and a greeting card expressing best wishes for a fabulous start to the school year.

2. Ask Mom or Dad for a copy of the school supply list as well as suggestions on what you can purchase to check off the list.

3. Offer to buy the all-important backpack or lunch box — but only if the child goes with you to pick it out. Fads and styles come and go in an instant, and if your grandchild doesn't get a box or bag donning her favorite character or what's hot among her peers, chances are she won't be lugging either to school.

4. Speaking of backpacks, recruit your grandchild to help you purchase and fill a backpack for a less-fortunate child. Most schools will gladly accept such donations for their students in need, plus a handful of charitable organizations conduct backpack drives. Check around in your city for such opportunities or do a Google search for "backpack donations" to find an organization near you.

5. Request a copy of the school calendar so you can mark important dates and events you may be able to attend, such as the back-to-school open house, fall programs, field days, sporting events and more. The calendar should show Grandparents Day events, too — which, given enough notice, even long-distance grandparents may be able to attend.

6. Ask Mom or Dad if they mind, then sign up for email newsletters and blog updates from the teacher. Every school should have a website with reams of information of interest to parents and grandparents, and many teachers are now required to keep a blog for those who want to stay on top of what's happening in the classroom.

7. If you’re a local grandparent, check with Mom or Dad first — you don’t want to overstep your boundaries — then email the child's teacher to introduce yourself.

8. Then go beyond simply introducing yourself to your grandchild's teacher and offer to volunteer in the classroom. One of the most active and admirable grandma volunteers I've come across is Grandma Kc from the former blog Amaraland. Years after her granddaughter was out of elementary school, Kc continues to volunteer there. Long-distance grandparents who can't help at their grandchild's school can make a difference by volunteering to be a grandparent helper at a nearby school. Just as your grandchild is far away, there are many grandchildren whose grandparents are far away — kids who would be thrilled to have a stand-in for their Grandma or Grandpa (their teacher would, too).

9. Stock up on postcards or gift cards to send to your grandchild throughout the year to show your support for their hard efforts and your wish for their educational success. Adults often take it for granted children just know we want them to do well in school, but having our wishes in writing to hold in their hands and re-read when studies — and peer pressure — overwhelm can bouy kids in tough times we adults may not even realize they're having.

10. Show genuine interest in their lessons and encourage further learning outside the classroom. Have an open and ongoing dialogue about what you most enjoyed about classes at the child's age, ask what he's excited to learn or most challenged by, find out what he wants to know more about. Then plan outings related to subjects they're especially interested in. My grandma friend Judy can teach us all a thing or two about doing exactly that, as she and her husband regularly supplemented her grandchildren's lessons with fun and educational activities, road trips and more throughout their school years.

Back-to-school time can be scary and challenging for all students, from those just entering kindergarten on up to those who've been at it for years. No matter their age, be sure your grandchildren know they can count on you to cheer them on as they hit the books this fall.

Today's question:

What was your favorite new school supply when you were a student?

Grandparents and childcare: Long-distance grandmas can do it, too

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I must say, I'm one fortunate long-distance grandma. My good fortune—despite the bad fortune of my only two grandsons living 815 miles away—lies in the fact that I get to visit Bubby and Mac at their desert home in just a few weeks.

Again.

I just visited them in December.

And in October.

And in August.

Plus, they visited me and the rest of our mountain-dwelling family in June.

And there were a few times I visited the desert in the early months of the year, as well.

Do I have megabucks that allow me to keep my calendar marked with travel dates to see my grandsons, all to keep my heart from breaking over living so far away from them.

Not at all. In fact, this past year has been particularly challenging for me, in terms of finances.

It's been a good year for my daughter and son-in-law, though. Good in terms of finances because Megan went back to full-time work, and Preston is rocking the financial-advising world. Which translates to a good year for me because all their time committed to work means they need someone to babysit my grandsons.

Bubby and Mac do have their daily childcare needs met by an in-home provider—at their home—thanks to their great Aunt Katie, Preston's aunt. She watches Mac every day and Bubby every day that he's not at his two-mornings-a-week preschool. There are times, though, that Megan and Preston need the boys covered for 24/7 stints Aunt Katie can't cover.

And that's where I come in.

The reason I get to see my adorable grandsons far more often than the average grandma-bear might get to see her grandbears is because I come in pretty handy as a fill-in childcare provider. On Megan and Preston's dime.

As working parents, Megan and Preston have daycare built into their budget. And if anyone reading this knows anything about childcare costs nowadays, it ain't cheap. Gramma, though, does come cheap. At least not any more expensive to fly me there for a week and back home again than the cost typically paid for a week's worth of childcare.

A week of childcare with built-in Gramma time for the boys, all for one low price of plane fare.

Who wins in that scenario? All of us! I win. My grandsons win. Megan and Preston win.

As I added dates for my upcoming desert trip to my new 2013 calendar, I considered how grateful and how lucky I am, and thought that maybe other long-distance grandmas could be just as lucky, if only they took a chance and asked the parents of their grandkids to consider a similar arrangement.

Long-distance grandmas: Ask! Ask if you can help out with childcare for your grandchildren. And ask if they'll foot the bill to fly you to their home to do just that. Then you and your loved ones can win, too.

I'm definitely not the only grandma to do this. In fact, many years before I reached grandma status, I learned a former boss of mine had retired when her first grandbaby arrived and was traveling from Colorado to Chicago on alternating weeks to help cover childcare. Childcare is expensive; the manner in which parents now handle the juggling of it is far different from what we may remember from our own days of raising children while being employed.

Of course there are a few caveats:

  • Some childcare arrangements require the parents to pay for days the child won't be attending, so don't be offended if your offer of services is turned down for financial reasons.
  • It's likely only economically advantageous if you cover the childcare for a week. This could be for a week jam-packed with appointments and events for Mom and Dad, who wouldn't be leaving town, just busy. (I've covered such times). Or it could be a week in which Mom and Dad need to be out of town, be it for a conference or possibly even a regular ol' kid-free vacation for the parents. (I've covered even more of those times.)
  • And it's likely only comparable to the cost of their regular childcare if reasonable airfare can be arranged.
  • Also likely: The arrangement requires the traveling grandma to be self-employed or retired...or willing to use her paid time off from her regular job for the childcare stint.
  • A week as the sole childcare provider can be exhausting, especially for long-distance grandmas who don't care for kids often.

The bottom line: Childcare is a huge expense for families with young children, and that expense may be a bit more palatable if they can fit in some grandma time for the grandkids on that same tab, too.

It's worth asking. Trust me.

Today's question:

What was your childcare arrangement when your kids were young?

The Saturday Post: Shake and fold edition

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We're all adults, and we've all learned lots of complicated things in our long and illustrious lives.

But were we ever taught how to properly use a paper towel?

I know I wasn't; you probably weren't either.

Have no fear, though, for that lesson is here.

Enjoy.

Shake and fold, my friends, shake and fold.

Today's question:

Honestly, how many paper towels do you typically take? (I confess to always taking two...at least.)