Conflicting wishes

Bubby visited Santa over the weekend. Last year, he clung to Daddy and refused to enjoy his time with Mr. Magical himself. This year, though, he did much better:

Despite being nervous about the visit -- hence the hand in the mouth -- Bubby did okay. He even managed to tell Santa what he wants for Christmas.

And what may that be?

A big orange truck!

Which comes as a surprise considering Bubby, as some of you may recall, already has a big orange truck: (BLOG REDESIGN DELETED THE VIDEO.)

I suppose at two-and-a-half-years-old, when you love something dearly, you have no qualms requesting more of the same.

Hopefully Bubby will forget all about having asked for a big orange truck once he sees all the other loot from Santa because I'm betting he won't find one under his tree come Christmas morning. One big orange truck is more than enough for one little boy.

Plus, I'm pretty sure poor Roxy -- who's often the unintentional hit-and-run doggy victim of the big orange truck -- has been fervently asking Santy Paws to make all her Christmas dreams come true ... by getting rid of Bubby's big orange truck and never again allowing such tools of terror to be added to Bubby's toy collection.

Holiday question of the day:

What's one thing you're hoping to find under the tree for yourself on Christmas morning?

My dreams for my grandson

These are my dreams for my grandson as he grows:

That he always shows gratitude, curiosity, strength, forgiveness.

That he exercises his body and mind in equal proportions.

That he laughs daily, with others, at himself.

That he loves himself, is proud of himself, treats himself kindly, compassionately.

That he shows kindness and compassion to others, to animals, to nature.

That he turns a deaf ear to intimidation and ignorance when it comes to thinking and doing what's good, what's right.

That he understands the value of patience, compromise, silence, restraint.

That he always loves learning ... and teaching.

That he uses his hands for hugging not hurting.

That he accepts responsibility.

That he does his part.

That he has -- and is -- a true and loyal friend.

That he makes time for silliness, pleasure, play.

That he appreciates and cultivates strong bonds with his siblings, from youth to old age.

That he embraces productivity and pursues careers that matter to him, to the world.

That always -- always -- people are more important to him than things.

That he keeps his word.

That home, family, tradition matter.

That he communicates -- in small ways, large ways and when it may not seem to matter ... but does.

That he never fails to see the beauty, the delightful, the admirable, the awesome.

That he never fails to see those less fortunate.

That he takes nothing for granted.

That his fears and nerves lead him to greatness not despair.

That he appreciates differences of opinion, culture, ideas.

That he has abundant supporters, cheering him on. When he can't hear them cheering, that he doesn't hesitate to cheer for himself.

That he finds a loving forever mate and together they create a loving forever family.

That he makes a positive difference in the world, be it as simple as a smile to a passing stranger or as complex as contributing to global change.

That he never breaks his mother's heart. Or his father's.

That he builds people up, not tear them down.

That he's slow to anger, quick to reason.

That he leads more than he follows, listens more than he speaks.

That his body, mind and soul stay strong, growing and bending but never breaking.

That he dances, sings, eats, enjoys, cries, giggles, dreams without worrying what others may think.

That he sets goals far and high and reaches them ... then goes beyond them.

That adversity makes him stronger not hopeless.

That he uses the words I will more often than I'll try or I can't.

That his heart is gentle and generous yet strong and resilient.

That he keeps an open mind.

That the words misogynist, racist, hateful, liar, addict, or bully are never used to describe him.

That he never, ever doubts he's loved.

That the love he gives in return is never in doubt.

That he travels.

That he dares.

That he excels.

That he lives.

That he depends on God's guidance, comfort, forgiveness, love always, in all ways.

That all who touch his life help make these dreams a reality.

More importantly, that he makes these dreams a reality. Plus every single dream of his own.

Holiday question of the day:

If you could give one gift that can't be wrapped -- the realization of a dream, goal, wish, trait -- to one person, what would you give and to whom would you give it?

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Sharin' the love

While Jim, Brianna, Andrea and I drove to the airport last Wednesday, Megan and Preston visited the doctor to find out the sex of their new baby.

While Jim, Brianna, Andrea and I sat at the gate waiting for departure, Megan and Preston sent us several goofy text messages announcing that Baby No. 2 will be a boy.

While Jim, Brianna, Andrea and I were visiting Megan and Preston -- and Bubby -- for Thanksgiving, we all wondered aloud now and then how Bubby will fare once he has a little brother with whom he must share everything. Well, mostly everything.

Of top concern was how Bubby will fare sharing the attention of those who love and adore him. For in the short three days we were there for the Thanksgiving holiday, Bubby was the star attraction, the one and only recipient of lots of loving.

He got love and attention from Gramma.

And (he of the great ear handles) PawDad.

(Great) Grandpa Wes.

And GiGi (Great Grandma).

Aunt B gave lots of loving.

As did Aunt Andie.

Even Mister Scott (of haircutting fame) dished out giggle-inducing attention.

Naturally, he's Daddy's little super star (and chief ear-holder).

And pre-Turkey Trot Mommy's good luck charm and more.

So with a baby brother on the way, my question is this: With all that love and attention dished out by Bubby's many admirers, would it be best for us all to taper off the adoration a tad now, in preparation for Bubby soon having to learn how to graciously share?

Or do we dish out even bigger portions now, making the most of these relatively few final months before Bubby becomes forever more a big brother, with a little brother getting his fair share (possibly even a rather unfair share at first) of all the love and attention we have to dish out?

Today's question:

What do you think: Slightly taper off the attention now so Bubby doesn't have to go cold turkey OR smother the boy and spoil the heck out of him during his last days as the one and only?

Weevils, the heads, and turkey days past

It's one week until Thanksgiving Day, and I can't wait.

This will be the first Thanksgiving that one of my daughters will host the affair. Jim, Brianna, Andrea and I are headed to Megan's for the big day, to include the community turkey trot (the girls are trotting; I'm watching), time with Bubby, and Thanksgiving dinner together as a family.

I'm excited to add this "first" to the collection of Thanksgiving memories that have been rumbling 'round my head and heart the last couple days. Things like ...

Thanksgivings early on as a family, when the girls and Jim and I had to eat two turkey dinners in the same day to accommodate holiday visits to both parents -- both my parents, not my in-laws.

Thanksgiving in South Dakota with the Indians. Real Indians from the reservation, who were friends of Jim's sister and brother-in-law, our hosts. The weekend included horseback rides for the girls, silly nephews pitching olives during the meal and the obligatory visit to "The Heads" (Mount Rushmore, for the uninitiated).

Another Thanksgiving in South Dakota, another visit to "The Heads." The time Granny reserved a room at her church to accommodate her many visiting relatives. Just before the meal, she realized she'd forgotten to make potatoes and cheerfully announced she could throw together instant potatoes she had at home. "My husband will NOT be eating instant mashed potatoes for Thanksgiving," snarled one of Jim's sisters. The sister who eventually left her husband -- for her daughter's ex-boyfriend. The husband who eventually died -- from complications of a broken heart.

Once again: Thanksgiving in South Dakota. The year Megan and Andie wrecked their car on the way home from college. So we drove two cars to South Dakota -- Brianna and my mom in one; Jim, Megan, Andie and I in the other -- so that after the festivities (and, of course, a visit to "The Heads") Jim and I could take the girls back to college. We drove from the Black Hills of South Dakota to the east side of Nebraska to drop off the girls, then home to Colorado ... driving straight through. It was our first introduction to Red Bull and Monster energy drinks -- and the last time we'll ever drive that many miles without sleep.

The long-standing tradition of spreading Indian-corn kernels on the Thanksgiving dinner table, with everyone invited to place kernels symbolizing their personal blessings in the special "gratitude" dish at any time during the meal. The tradition I can never explain to guests because I get all verklempt thinking of my many, many blessings. Thankfully one of the girls always steps in and explains it for me -- another blessing that increases my verklempt state. Every time.

The first Thanksgiving I hosted at my house for all the extended family, including my older sister and her husband, whom I wanted desperately to impress. Naturally it would be the year that when I pulled out my "gratitude" dish with Indian-corn kernels saved from the previous year and dumped the kernels onto the beautifully set Thanksgiving table, weevils -- who'd been happily noshing on the kernels all year -- scattered everywhere. Yes, I made an impression.

The first year Jim and I participated in any Black Friday madness. It was the year of the Furby fracas and each of the girls wanted a Furby. We woke up early, went to store after store in the dark -- and came away with three Furbys (Furbies?), one for each of the girls! Thanks in large part to my brother and his wife who were staying with us for the holiday. My brother who no longer speaks to me or Jim ... hasn't for years ... for reasons I don't understand.

The Thanksgiving Jim and I hosted the family mere days after moving into our current house. Boxes still awaited unpacking, furniture, rugs, curtains and more still needed to be purchased and placed. Yet Megan and Preston came -- it was the visit when they announced they were pregnant! -- Andrea invited a visitor from Brazil (I think it was Brazil), and many from my extended family attended. Truly one of my warmest Thanksgiving memories ever, despite the cantankerous and not-yet-working-correctly boiler system of our new place.

Thanksgiving activities with the family: crafting ornaments, doing puzzles, decorating gingerbread houses, painting canvases to adorn the walls of our new home. Megan's creation the year of the canvas? A depiction of how cold our seemingly cavernous house was thanks to that pesky boiler system, especially to one accustomed to desert temperatures.

The tradition of the girls, when they were too young to cook, contributing to the festivities by making dinner mints -- a cream-cheese and powdered sugar concoction flavored with peppermint, pressed into candy molds then popped out for sharing. A tradition that will be passed along to Bubby this year, so he too can contribute to the meal even though he's not yet able to cook.

It's one week until Bubby's little hands squish and squash like Play-doh the traditional dinner mints. Mints that will surely, in years to come, be remembered as the sweetest dinner mints ever.

And I can't wait!

Photo credit: stock.xchng

Today's question:

What are some memories from your Thanksgivings past?

Liar or storyteller?

Does nabbing Mommy's bag of chips and running away (with his mouth full!) make Bubby a thief, too?Megan called late Sunday afternoon.

"Guess what Bubby just told me," she said. (See, she still does the "Know What?" thing.)

"What?"

"Bubby told me PawDad was drinking beer ... at Gramma's."

"What?"

"And Bubby said Gramma was drinking beer, too."

First, the backstory for those who don't know: Bubby came to visit Gramma and PawDad in the mountains at summer's end. Without Mom or Dad. Which is why Megan wasn't too sure about what her son was telling her.

Her tone wasn't accusatory, but with a plethora of alcoholics in our extended family, I clearly picked up on an underlying WTH? in Megan's question.

"That's weird. Dad and I certainly weren't drinking any beer while Bubby was here. And I seriously doubt he saw it in the bar since he never even went near it while here. I have no idea why he'd say that."

Yes, we have a bar. And yes, it's stocked with a fair amount of beer ... and liquor. Everyone in my house is pretty responsible about drinking, so it's no big deal we indulge now and then. But Jim and I certainly didn't indulge while Bubby was here. That would not have been responsible.

Megan knows us pretty well -- we are her parents, for heaven's sake -- so she believed me and that was that. No biggie. I do understand that as a concerned parent, she had to ask. Just in case.

Then Megan put Bubby on the phone.

"Hi, Gramma!" he bubbled.

"Hi, Bubby! What are you doing?"

"We're going shopping!"

"Shopping!? What are you going shopping for?"

"COOKIES! Chocolate CHIP cookies," he shouted.

"Oh yeah? Are you having chocolate chip cookies for dinner?" (I was just kidding, just being silly, of course.)

"Yeah! Chocolate chip cookies for dinner!" he confirmed.

"Yum! You enjoy your chocolate chip cookies for dinner. I'll talk to you later, Bubby. I love you!"

"I wuh woo," he said, then gave the phone back to Megan.

"Cookies for dinner?" I asked her.

"No. He's a little liar!" she said with a chuckle. "I have no idea what he's talking about."

"Yeah, I don't know what he's talking about either. Oh well. You go enjoy your chocolate chip cookies for dinner."

"Okay. You go enjoy your beer! Talk to you later!"

End of story, end of interrogation.

So what's up with that? Is my two-and-a-half-year-old grandson a little liar, trying to get his mommy and his grandma in trouble with each other?

Or is Bubby simply a silly little storyteller, exercising his imagination and making up tales of goofiness?

I suppose either case might be okay at this point because if not, it's woefully clear that I failed miserably in teaching my daughter how to serve balanced meals to her family!

Today's question:

Do you think toddlers lie? Do you think they understand the concept of lying?