January 27, 2017

On adult children: Learning the boundaries of communication (guest post)

January 27, 2017/ Lisa Carpenter

Dear readers: This guest post was written by my grandma friend and fellow GRANDparent Network member Donne Davis of GaGa Sisterhood. Thank you so much for sharing this wisdom on the tricky-at-times relationship between parents and their adult children, Donne.

mother and adult daughter

When it comes to communicating with your adult children, where do you get stuck? I posed this question to the 25 GaGas attending our January 15 meeting and added, is it around discipline, visitation, values or boundaries?

All of the above, and more, they answered. One member said: “All I have to do is open my mouth and my son misinterprets what I’m saying.” Another joked: “OMG! Just asking ‘how are you’ can trigger...

August 22, 2016

Pool party!

August 22, 2016/ Lisa Carpenter

Pool parties have long been a favorite way for kids to celebrate their birthdays, whether it be in their own backyard swimming pool or a paid party option at the local public swimming spot.

My daughters never got to have a pool party for their birthdays when I was in charge of party planning. In part because I can't swim and the thought of being responsible for little ones bobbing about in a body of water, large or small, scared the bejeezus out of me.

October 19, 2015

Musing elsewhere: Thoughts on my daughter's miscarriage (PurpleClover.com)

October 19, 2015/ Lisa Carpenter

Thoughts on my daughter's miscarriage

Published October 18, 2015 on PurpleClover.com

My daughter lost her baby last week. A miscarriage in the first trimester.

Coming from an abundantly fertile family, it's hard to wrap my head around that. My mom had seven children. Three of my sisters had several children, and a number of those kids had kids. I had three children myself, and my middle child had three children, too.

All of us had no problem. Yet it's a problem for my oldest child, Brianna.

"Problem" doesn't come close to accurately describing the fertility challenge for my daughter. A dead baby is far more than a problem. It's a painful, traumatic, inexplicable loss.

My 33-year-old daughter, who learned just this past year that her chances for conceiving and delivering a child are sadly...

Click to continue reading on PurpleClover.com...

February 05, 2015

Musing elsewhere: When a teen mom hits midlife

February 05, 2015/ Lisa Carpenter

In the summer of 1982, I graduated from high school, got married, turned 18, and had a baby. I went from kid to wife and mother in the span of three months, just like that.

teen mom and baby

My husband was 21 at the time. Now, 33 years later, we're empty-nesters. We've patted ourselves on the back for a job well done. We beat the odds and raised three lovely and amazing daughters from diapers to dorm rooms and into the real world. Our journey featured little outside the typical bumps, bruises and pains of parenthood, despite the fact that we were mere children ourselves at the outset. Our girls are grown and gone—one has even made us grandparents.

Time to rejoice! Time to enjoy midlife!

Time for an unexpected reality check, is more like it.

Once my kids split and I recovered from the initial empty-nest jitters, it became clear that having been a teen mother would...Click here to continue reading my article published on PurpleClover.com.

December 23, 2014

Christmas and how the empty nest gets harder after college

December 23, 2014/ Lisa Carpenter

I used to be one of those moms whose child — or children, plural — recently left for college. You know... the moms walking around with a dazed, how-the-heck-did-this-happen-so-fast look in their eyes, virtually visible cracks in their hearts as they miss the once little ones who have flown their nest. They're the moms who live for holiday breaks, spring breaks, summer breaks, for that's when their loved ones return home, back to the safety of the nest where mom can hold each one in her arms and savor the sweet scents and sounds of her babies all around.

family christmas stockings

I was one of those moms. That first year my daughters were scattered afar for schooling and such was rough. It got easier, though, as it does for all moms (and dads) whose kiddos have gone off for enrichment and enlightenment on the road to becoming full-fledged adults. I found new...

October 29, 2014

Middle child of my middle child

October 29, 2014/ Lisa Carpenter

The Middle Child
Even though you're not the oldest,
or the youngest, you see,
Being in the middle is a really neat place to be!
The middle of a sandwich
is the most important part,
And in the middle of your body,
you will find your heart.
The engine in the middle
is what runs a good machine;
And our family wouldn't be the same
without you in between.
~Unknown