Saturday movie review: Two to avoid

If you've read my Saturday movie reviews very long, you likely know that offbeat films and those that, despite fabulous writing and acting, somehow flew under the radar of average movie-goers are my favorite sorts of flicks.

Because of those preferences, I thought for sure the following two films would thoroughly intrigue and garner raves from me. Oh, how much more wrong could I be? I typically share movies reviews on films I'd love for you to see; today, though, I'm compelled to tell you what to not see. I watched through to the end of both so you wouldn't have to and now pass along my thoughts in hopes the offbeat storylines and stellar casts showcased in the trailers won't hoodwink you to the degree they did me. 

reach me movie

First up, REACH ME, starring a diverse cast, from Kyra Sedgewick to the handsome Thomas Jane to Lauren Cohan of Walking Dead to Tom Berenger, Sylvester Stallone and more. The storyline goes that Berenger plays a reclusive author of a self-help book that has changed the lives of millions. He's become a superstar to many who hope to reach their full potential by following his lead and motivational words of wisdom. The many include killers, cops, and bad but bumbling gangsters. That's about it.


Looks like it could be worth spending 95 minutes watching, right? Nah... Save your time (and Netflix queue spot) by avoiding this one. It's all around Meh with a capital M.

REACH ME (rated Rated PG-13 for sexual content, violence, language, drug use, and smoking) was released last year (it's unclear whether it played theatrically or went straight to Internet and/or DVD) and is available on DVD and more. 

Third Person movie

It pains me a tad to tell you the next film, THIRD PERSON, is one to avoid. It had such promise. Written and directed by Paul Haggis of CRASH fame (among others), this movie stars an incredible cast including Liam Neeson, Olivia Wilde, Mila Kunis, Kim Basinger, James Franco, Maria Bello, Adrien Brody and others.

The film has three storylines, all obscurely connected in a way you find out only at the end. The primary one features Neeson as a Pulitzer Prize-winning author who has holed up in a hotel to work on his next masterpiece. He's separated from Kim Basinger and having an affair with Olivia Wilde (who truly is half his age!). The other two stories revolve around Kunis and Franco, and Brody and dark-haired beauty Katy Louise Saunders.

The characters were uninteresting and distant, their storylines only vaguely intriguing, and there was a whole lot of waiting for what turned out to be not much of anything. This one was far more disappointing to me because I had such high hopes for it, considering Haggis and much of the cast. Far more time consuming, too — at two hours and seventeen minutes!

THIRD PERSON (Rated R for language and some sexuality/nudity) was released theatrically in 2014 and is available on DVD and such.

Today's question:

Which of these two have you seen or want(ed) to see?