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    « Exhaustion, perspective, and GRAND Social No. 67 | Main | Back-to-school books for all ages, including grandmas »

    What I learned this week: One way my eldest daughter is not like me

    My eldest daughter, Brianna, is very much like me. She and I enjoy the same books, same movies, same music — for the most part (that silly girl adores country music far more than I ever will).

    We like the same clothing style, love the same foods, and we have many of the same mannerisms. We even unintentionally say the very same things at the very same times often enough that Jim, upon hearing our comments in stereo — one side me, one side Brianna — regularly responds to us with, "Will you two stop doing that!?"


    Yes, Brianna is very much like me.

    There is one way in which my daughter is so not like me, though. It's something we both learned this week. It's something that led me to thank God out loud upon hearing.

    That something is this: Brianna does not have MS.

    I'm talking about multiple sclerosis — a drag of a disease I've worried for decades one or more of my daughters would inherit from me... despite there being no proof MS is hereditary.

    Hereditary or not, Brianna began expressing concerns about unusually numb feet and oddball sensations in her body about six months ago. Just a complaint here and there, sentiments she'd pass along knowing darn well it was scaring the hell out of me despite my calm and reassuring demeanor at the mentions.

    "It's probably just related to your back," I'd say on the outside while fearing the worst on the inside.

    See, Brianna was in a car accident a few years ago, rear-ended by a landscaping truck that never even hit the brakes as she was stopped at a red traffic light. It wasn't good, especially for her back. Brianna eventually, though not even 25 years of age at the time, had to undergo emergency back surgery months after the accident but related to the accident. She's had minor pain and numbness and pings and pinches in her feet and legs ever since.

    But when those minor pings and pains recently changed to major and began sounding more and more like the pings and pains I experienced before being diagnosed with MS 21 years ago, neither of us could ignore the symptoms. Brianna needed to see a doctor who would confirm or rule out MS.

    Brianna saw that doctor Wednesday.

    The doctor ruled out MS Wednesday.

    I learned Wednesday that my daughter who is very-so-very much like me is not like me in the one way I prayed she and her sisters would never, ever be.


    Yes, there's nerve damage and neuropathy and issues my daughter — who just turned 31 on Sunday — will deal with the rest of her life, things that may worsen throughout her life.

    We both agree that sucks.

    Yet we also both agree on this: Thank God it's not MS.

    In that way we are very much alike.

    In that way we both say — in stereo — hallelujah!

    And that is what I — and Brianna — learned this week.

    I learned another thing this week (yesterday, in fact), this one far more sad: Our bloggy friend Joan, whom many of you know as Gramcracker and who blogs at Gramcracker Crumbs, lost her husband unexpectedly this week. Please keep Joan and her loved ones in your thoughts and prayers.

    Have a safe, happy and memorable weekend. I look forward to connecting with you again on Monday.

    Today's question:

    What did you learn this week?

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    Reader Comments (13)

    In my opinion, there's nothing better than good medical news and nothing more painful than the sudden loss of a loved one. I'm saying thank you prayers for your Brianna and prayers of comfort for Joan and her family.

    I'm too saddened by the news of Joan's loss to tease your MIA reader Cathy today. However, I have every intention of doing so next 6 am CST.

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterNonnieKelly

    I learned that I cant endure as much physical pain as I thought I could. And that there is worse pain than labor pains.

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterPammeey

    Now that is something to celebrate! :)

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGinny Marie

    Yes, I join the Hallelujah Chorus for Brianna's news. And, I am so sorry to hear Joan's news...having lost a beloved husband 18 years ago, I can truly imagine her sorrow. May God comfort her.

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAnn

    You found out Wednesday and you haven't been screaming it from the roof top? I'm surprised I couldn't hear you! That is so wonderful.

    Now on the not wonderful note -- thanks for letting us know about Joan. How tragic.

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGrandma Kc

    What a relief for both of you. There is nothing worse than watching your child suffer and not knowing what it is. And yoga or Pilates might be helpful for Brianna, depending on the type and teacher.

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterAlexandraFunFit

    I am so glad that it is not MS and I'll join the chorus ( off key, however :) and I hope that whatever is going on works its way in it will subside. I am not on FB too much and just saw your post and about Joan. Oh my I am so very sorry for her /what a horrible awful sudden shocking surprise for her and her family :(

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterdebra @ homespun

    What a weight lifted from your shoulders - I love good medical news about one's children.

    thanks for telling us about Joan's loss.

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered Commenterbelinda


    I am so glad your daughter is not like me either! When you told me of her diagnosis, I wasn't happy she has what she has, but it's nothing like MS, and for that I am grateful.

    Healing prayers for your blogging friend, and prayer to Heaven for her husband. Such sadness is tragic and sad.

    Big hugs,
    P.S. Give Nonnie Kelly a hug and tell her she's the champ and can keep her role - it suits her! With love to you both from your NON MIA reader!! :=)

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCathy

    So happy for both of you. Cannot get over how much you two look alike! Beautiful picture, wonderful news.

    August 23, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterGrown and Flown

    I am so sorry about Joan's husband. Thank you for telling us so we can keep her in our prayers.
    Your daughter is so pretty and all three of your girls seem to always be smiling. And why not? They have a loving family and now, this good news to keep things that way!

    August 24, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJoyce

    Lisa, I am SO very happy to hear that Brianna's diagnosis was NOT MS. Y'all's story really touched my heart- we experienced just the opposite. My older daughter, Mary, is exactly like me. People say to her, "Oh, you must be Joy's daughter....and they say to me, "Oh, you must be Mary's mom!" :)

    A few years ago, she began having MS symptoms. I do not have MS. You know I hoped she would continue to be like me....but in this case, she was not. In this one case, she was more like her dad's mom, aunt, and sister, all precious ladies with MS. Reading your post made me very, very happy for you and your family! :)

    Love and congratulations hugs!


    August 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterJoy @ Yesterfoodj

    Such good news!

    August 26, 2013 | Unregistered CommenterCarol Covin
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