Now that I'm a grandma: Realization #47
I admit it: I am a prude. I use the word loosely here, not in a sexual sense. I simply mean I've become straight-laced. And I didn't used to be. I've done and said and been all kinds of things in the past that were not very prude and straight-laced at all. Some actually not so far in the past and some still presently going on.
For one, I've always considered myself a pretty rocking grandma. Hard rock is my music of choice more often than not. And I only recently quit going to rock concerts—because of economics, not age.
Plus, while I've never been a cigarette smoker, I sure as heck still enjoy alcohol on a fairly regular basis. I'm talking 7&7s, too, not some girly umbrella drink.
And swearing? I don't say the F-word myself—except when I poke myself in the eye with the mascara wand—but I have no qualms about others saying it. Well, unless, of course, it's mothers saying it in front of children, regardless of their children's age, or people who utter it only when they've downed two or ten too many margaritas, mojitos or Miller Lites. Same goes for GD when anyone says it, regardless of reason.
Yes, I admit that unless I'm around my grandkids, I show little restraint when it comes to spewing bad words, especially those that begin with S, H, D, B, or A. When writing blog posts I typically write <cuss> instead of writing the cuss word I have in mind, but in real life I can be a real potty mouth.
I'm not proud of that potty mouth nor of any other non-grandmotherly things I do. But there was always some twisted sense of pride in being able to say I'm not a prude.
Well, not anymore. Alas, I am indeed a prude.
I lately felt prudeness creeping up on me as I noticed more and more of my friends and family apologizing to me when they uttered certain utterances that typically make grandmas cringe—even if I hadn't cringed, hadn't even noticed the offense. Now, though, I know for a fact that I'm in full-blown prude status. At least when I'm in charge of my grandsons.
I realized I'd officially crossed over to Prudeville when I took Bubby to see The Adventures of TinTin. It's rated PG, so I figured it would be safe to see with my nearly four-year-old grandson. He had no problem with it but within the first five minutes, I did. I had a huge problem with it and actually considered leaving the theater. There were guns and fisticuffs and unsavory behavior from the moment the title sequence flashed across the stage. Guns, I tell you! Shooting! All being deliciously savored by my grandson, who is not allowed to have guns, not allowed to watch violence beyond what takes place in nature, like in, say, The Lion King and Jungle Book.
As Bubby smiled and swayed and reeled from gunfire and leaned over to me to say, "This is a great day and the movie is the best part, Gramma!" I sat there worrying that I was warping the sweet little boy beside me, that the gentle soul who had accompanied me into the theater would transform into the town bully when we walked out. Because of the violence I let him witness on screen.
And the drinking. Of alcohol. Oh my! One of the main characters in the movie was a drunk. A sweet drunk, but a drunk nonetheless.
I think there were actually a few swear words in the film, too. I don't remember for certain, though, as I was just too consumed watching for blood to spurt during the swashbuckling scenes (it didn't) or death to come to one or another of the bad guys who stood in TinTin's way (which it didn't). Or to the drunk, or, heaven forbid, to TinTin himself and his little dog, too. (Again, it didn't. Luckily.)
Bubby loved the movie, talked about it at length on the way home. And he didn't take aim at Baby Mac with imaginary guns or pretend to slice up Mom, Dad, or the dog with a fake sword. And he didn't chug his drink then slam down his glass as if a tankard and tell Mom "Hit me up again!" at dinner. Luckily.
Still, I felt bad, as if I'd tainted my grandchild. Which is ridiculous, I know. It was a PG movie, for heaven's sake. Megan and Preston drink alcohol. They watch violent shows on TV (after Bubby has gone to bed). They use swear words. I'd venture to say they've even let the F-word fly when little pitchers were unknowingly nearby.
It's their taste in music, though, that proved my ultimate saving grace, saved me from being the one who tainted Bubby. It also solidified for me my self-label of prude.
To wit: As Bubby and I drove home from the movie that fateful day, he shouted from the back seat "Turn it up, Gramma" when LMFAO (whom I later learned was the artist) came on the radio. He then proceeded to sing along.
And it was that very moment, as I watched Bubby in the rearview mirror popping about and singing, "Girl, look at that body...I work out!" then "Wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle wiggle, yeah!" that I knew I had crossed over. I had become a prude.
Bubby's wiggle dance was truly hilarious as <cuss>, but golly gee, it just seemed so wrong.
That right there, my bristling at a song that clearly made Bubby so happy, was the last straw, the final bit of proof that I've entered Prudeville.
And there's no turning back. Forget the Sexy and I Know It song. The only song this grandma will be doing the wiggle dance to is one a little more tame.
Well, at least in title. My song: I'm Prude and I Know It.
C'mon, fellow grandmas, join in! Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, yeah! Wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, wiggle, yeah! We're prude and we know it.
Maybe?
(One small confession: I'm not that much of a prude because I've actually had a weird affection for the LMFAO song ever since Bubby introduced it to me with his back-seat wiggle dance. Just don't tell anyone. And I won't tell anyone if you click on that link above and listen to it over and over and develop a wiggle song all of your very own.)
The voting continues: If you liked this post—or Grandma's Briefs in general—please vote for Grandma's Briefs in the About.com Favorite Grandparent Blog poll. Vote once per day through March 21. Thank you!
Today's question:
How much of a straight-laced prude are you?
Tuesday, February 28, 2012
Reader Comments (11)
I'm a strictly 'as the occasion calls for' straight laced prude. Despite my own natural tendencies toward a potty mouth, I never swear in front of the Grandchildren...and have been known to glare at daughter and son-in-law if they let one slip. Yes, I know wrong to glare, but at least I'm being honest here. They ignore me anyway.
Perhaps the most difficult is allowing my 4 year Granddaughter to watch Lady Gaga music videos and some others that I deem to be inappropriate (for her). Doesn't seem to phase her, but I'm worried she'll end up stripping in a nightclub when she's older. Didn't seem to bother me as a parent when my girls were watching Lady Madonna and various others? (cringe)
In regards to LMFAO (and Lil Jon) you might enjoy the adults only Drink video...just click on my name and it should appear. This now sometimes straight laced prude Gma won't be showing it to Granddaughter, but it gives me a solid...good for you...Grandparents laugh. Older doesn't mean dead yet....prude or not!
The wicked side of me is now signing off.
NonnieKelly: Ha! Funny! Love the umbrellas in the drinks and that limber granny. Now I know you're no prude! :o) I couldn't bring myself to post the real LMFAO video to the song I write about, which is why the link above is to a SpongeBob version of it (with the real song, though). Some parts of the official video are definitely not safe for work...and probably not safe for many grandmas, either. Thanks for sharing yours! (And readers: Check out the video Kelly posted, if you have time, by clicking on her name in her comment; it'll give you the link to the video.)
OK, I may have freaked out just a tiny bit when Amara started singing \"I kissed a girl\" a couple of years ago. And I know that I freaked out when she started singing that song \"I'm sexy and I know it\" during dress rehearsals for the play. One of her 2nd grade girl friends stepped in and yelled at her -- \"Amara! You are not sexy\"! Then I laughed. I think I am just the right amount of prude.
You are not a prude, just a grandmother who will err on the side of caution regarding what those little sponges we call grandchildren will instantly soak up.
I think my all-grown-up grandchildren just accept the fact that, in their eyes, I'm crazy, but I'm pretty sure they still have things they won't say or do \\\"in front of Gramma\\\". Grandchildren subtlety show concern for what even crazy grandmothers think of them.
Well, I guess I'm kinda the straight laced type, but even I have become more cautious after having grandkids. I flinch at everything I heard on the tube when they are around. And when I am asked to turn tv to certain shows, I find mself asking them "are you sure it's ok for you to be watching this?!" My 5 yr old granddaughter is in love with the Bieber, and I find that shocking! Ha! Guess I am showing my age. I try to remember each generation has it's only idea of social norms even if I don't agree. I just do they best job of grand parenting I can in the only way I know how; be myself and love the blanky blank out of them! BTW, voting for you right now!
Oops! I didn't think about people watching from work...omigosh!!
Turn down the sound, make sure nobody's around, and DO NOT let the Grandkids watch!!!
(prude side of me checking back in)
Thank you Lisa for an interesting post. You always make me think about things in a different way.
Don't drink only because I don't like the after taste, but that doesn't make me a prude.
Prudish about sex scenes on TV, they make me feel very uncomfortable, thoughI love a dirty joke.
Have been known to swear using the 'f' word. Yet I'm a prude when I hear young people using the 'f' word.
Try not to swear in front of Lucy, though it has been known to happen, certainly not the 'f' word.
To me table manners are very important. So I suppose I'm a prude about that.
I used to swear often, but my daughter let us know that wouldn't be okay once she had kids, so I had lots of time to practice. We listen to lots of rock music with the kids, and their favorite song is the Who's "Momma's got a squeezebox." We sing it on every drive to preschool. Some day they'll realize the double-entendre and be shocked, I suppose. Also, we steer clear of violent videos except for the scary parts of Fantasia and Wizard of Oz. The parents let them watch one or two of the Star Wars movies. I thought that was too much, so on that day I felt like a prude!
Oh yes, I'm a prude! I admit it. LOL
My oldest grandson never saw a violent show on TV or in the movies but he is afraid of bad guys who have guns, which he calls"flashers," so I guess they learn from somewhere no matter how we try to shield them. I think the best thing to do is keep all lines of communication open and have conversations about why violence in any form is unacceptable
I loved the Sponge Bob version of this song but I like this Elmo version even better: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=uC2uHn5jw9g&feature=related
Great post! Me a straight-laced prude? I don't think so. Not in anyone's wildest dreams. LMAO.
I have to confess that I've become LESS a prude than I was. I'm not sure exactly why. I think I just care less what people think of me and that's a very good thing. My blog does have <cuss> words in it because that's how I think...and how I talk sometimes when little ears aren't around (and sometimes unfortunately when I forget they are).
But I agree about the movies. That's the only place I feel like a prude. I just feel like there's too much swearing and sex and does nothing to advance the story line...it's just there to sell tickets. Ugh. : )